Chapter One was about the Home Makeover. Chapter Two is all about the Parent Makover. As I look ahead, Chapter Three is about the Child Makeover, then Four is the Extended Family, and Five is the Church. It goes to show that it truly does take a community to raise a child, not just one single aspect of the community. Although I have been VERY slow in reading this book, I AM LOVING IT! So, here it goes for my report on Chapter Two!
There are so many people that attend church each week, get involved through volunteering, and participate in Bible studies, BUT for most of them that is exactly where it ends. We tend to not actually bring home the most important thing we need...FAITH!
The question is not ARE we passing on things to our children,
but instead,
WHAT are we passing on to them?
Author and pastor, Mark Holmen, tells a story of a father who called him asking for advice about the troubles he is having with his teenage daughter. The father describes their relationship as tense; they seem to butt heads on everything. The first question out of Holmen's mouth was, "Have you prayed with her about this situation?" The father was shocked...this idea had not even occured to him. All through his daughter's life he had been very involved. He attended all of her school programs, coached her soccer team, drove her to piano lessons, taught her Sunday School class, and more. But he had never sat down and prayed with his teenage daughter.
For some reason we tend to overlook all of the things our Lord is waiting for us to include Him in on. This father relied on the fact that his daughter was just going through a "teenage stage." He had been supportive in so many other ways that he was out of ideas. Pray...Together...What a great way to teach his daughter about how to deal with tense relationships! Holmen didn't say how things turned out, but I hope that the daughter learned a life-long skill and that their relationship was healed.
I have a feeling that with this father is was not that he didn't want to pray with his daughter, it was just that no one had ever shown him how.
Deuteronomy 6:6-7 (NIV) says:
6: These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.
7: Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk
along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
Whose job is it to teach our children? Is it up to the parents? What about the church's pastor, or better yet, the youth pastor???
Chapter Two of FBH has the results of a study that was done called "The Most Significant Religious Influences." In order from most important to least, the list goes:
#1 Mom
#2 Dad
#3 Grandparent
#4 Another relative
#5 Siblings
#6 Friends
#7 Pastor
#8 Church Camp
...
#13 Youth Group Leader at my church
...
#16 the Bible
...
#22 Worship services at church
There is your answer to the question as to whose job it is. Moms and Dads need to get involved and actually BRING THE FAITH HOME!
In our church we are in dire need of a Children and Family Ministry Director; someone who's job focus is on our parents and their youngsters. I know that a Youth Pastor is #13 on the list, but we need someone to actually TEACH the parents of our church HOW to bring home the faith to their children.
Why is this such a problem nowadays?
So many parents these days either never grew up in a Christian home, or they just weren't taught how to interact with others concerning Jesus. In church yesterday, Pastor Jay gave a statistic stating that only 48% of the U.S. know that Easter is a Christian holiday celebrating the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. That means that 52% think that Easter is solely about the Easter Bunny, hunting for eggs, and candy. Sad. Very sad.
Another reason that this is such a problem has to do with what I talked about in my blog on Faith Begins At Home: Chapter One back in March. (Click on the link to read it if you'd like.) To sum it up, church has become a "drop-off" zone and that explains why we have trouble brining the faith home. Dropping kids off doesn't lead to a lasting faith for most of those kids because faith hasn't been firmly established or lived out at home.
So, where do we start as parents?
WITH OURSELVES!
Your family's success begins with YOU and YOUR WILLINGNESS to let Jesus Christ into your life and into the very core of your family. Our kids are mirror images of us, so working on your own relationship with Jesus will cause them to do the same. So, start by figuring out where Christ is in your own life and go from there. You may be asking yourself, "what have I gotten myself into now?" Every parent has fears, yet God knows your fears. Thankfully He has provided you with everything you need to make the journey.
Holmen describes this journey in a really neat way. He compares it to a whitewater rafting trip. Lide rafting, you may be afraid, but its all laid out right there for you. You have:
-A Map of the River (The Bible) Psalm 119:105 "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path."
-A Guide (Jesus Christ) John 14:6 "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes through the Father except through me." AND John 16:13 "When He, the Spirit of Truth comes, He will guide you into all Truth." AND Isaiah 30:21 "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying 'This is the way, walk in it.' "
-A Raft (The Church) This one may need a bit more explanation. A raft is designed to get us down the river safely; a church is designed to help you through the highs and lows that life will throw at you. Romans 12:4-5 "Just as each of us has our one body with many members (legs, arms, hands, feet), and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others." This will get more attention in Chapter Five.
and
-A Crew ("Doing Life Deeply" Groups/Small Groups) Hebrews 10:25 "Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another."
-The Ride Itself (Life's Journey) Christ is offering us the ride of our life. If you choose to take it, not only you will be affected, but your children and their children will be as well. So, hop on the boat that leads to eternal life with the ultimate guide, Jesus Christ.
In closing, I would like to pass along a verse of a song (unnamed in the book, and I can't find it online) that Holmen loves, as do I:
Have we taught our children well,
is our life a show and tell,
can they see the love of Jesus in our eyes?
And when another page has turned,
do you think they will have learned,
to show the love of Jesus with their lives?
Have we taught our children well?
